Welcome to Because I Said So

I finally said it. Those 4 words we hated to hear as a kid. "Because I said so!" I was working on getting dinner ready last night. Every counter was covered, the sink was full and the more I cooked the more I realized I was making a mess I didn't want to clean up. I thought to myself....this is why I don't cook! Frustrated and feeling like a failure I decided to give up on cooking ever again and just make it through this one last meal and mess. Just then at the peak of my frustration my DD came stumbling in holding 5 things of paint and a bunch of papers falling all over the floor. "Mommy, can we paint?" OMG! I thought to myself. Is she really doing this to me? With my body full of frustration I snapped....."Does it look like it's a good time to paint?" Right away I see the look of confusion in her face. Of course it's a good time to paint in her eyes. Why wouldn't it be? Then I notice this sad little face looking at me, confused by my response to her question. Instead of feeling bad for her I get more frustrated becasue she is still standing there for some reason. I guess my response wasn't an actual answer so I quickly said, "No, you can't paint! Well, we all know what came next.........."WHY?" Well that was all it took. I spun my head around, looked her staight in the eyes and said, "BECAUSE I SAID SO!". Yikes! Did I really say it? I couldn't have. I always told myself I would never say those words. But there it was floating through the air right into my little girls ears. It was in that moment that I realized I needed to stop trying so hard to be a perfect mom and wife. There is no such thing.....so why try?